You guys, this whole 5 kids thing is not for the faint of heart!  I feel like I’m drowning over here.   How do all you superwomen do it?  I try and be super positive and never want anyone to worry about me but I decided to open up about how parenting really is HARD and EXHAUSTING.  And how sometimes we all struggle.

When I was planning my children, and I actually planned my children and it worked.  Because I am incredibly fertile and got pregnant the day I wanted to.  Anyways, I always planned my kids with at least a 2.5 year gap.  I actually made fun of people who weren’t smart enough to plan it where you always only had 2 kids at home and the other was in kinder.  I should have shut my mouth because karma is a…. you know what??!!

Because I had gaps with each of my first four kids, the newborn just seemed to slip in to my house when I brought them home and just made it a little more peaceful and heaven like.  Number 5 hasn’t quite been like that.  I feel a little like a worn out dog. Not sure why a dog but I couldn’t think of what animal looks like a haggard, worn out, tired mess.

Since having number 5 my life has changed a lot and here is how:

My house seems to NEVER remain clean for more than 2 minutes.

My little boy who was my fave and easiest a couple weeks ago has turned into an INSANE 18 month old.  I mean seriously how many cereals can you pour out, toilets can you clog, and tantrums can you throw a day??!!  I have never understood the safety locks on cupboards.  NOW it all makes sense… they aren’t for safety sillies they are for 18 month olds.

I am a freaking circus wherever I go.  I swear everyone is staring thinking this lady is nuts and CPS should prob come get her kids or maybe just put the psycho in the looney bin.

Yes, I have older kids to help me out but they are also fighting over who gets to do what and playing the comparison game.  So then I have to referee.  I really just want to be this really cool parent that gets to speak so softly and kind to my kids… not be a dang REFEREE!!!!

With each child, my desire to deck my kids to the ‘nines’ has continually dropped so can you imagine what they look like now with 5???  My first was never allowed to wear a onesie, or have her hair the same way twice within a months span, and never left the house without a bow.  Heck, Charlee is lucky to get a bath.

Sleep….what is that??  There is always someone up throughout the night about every 3 hours.  And mind you Charlee sleeps about 5-6 hour spans.  So this means that the others are waking up and they are just too dang old.  So yes mama bear is struggling in the sleep department.

I honestly and truthfully count my kids! (enter monkey covering eye emoji here)  Yes it is true.  I constantly worry I have forgotten one or misplaced one.  I have a tribe ladies.  My husband even sat me down for a talk that before leaving the car EVERY TIME I MUST look back and make sure all children are out and I have all accounted for.

My financial state of mind has gone haywire.  I worry how in the world am I going to pay for cars, missions, weddings, college, and everything in between.  And the craziest thing is I will have a driver in 5.5 years!!!  So I better stop worrying and just start saving.

I CRY because I am exhausted.  Who does that?? I never have.  You can say either the nicest thing to me or nothing to me and I want to well up and start bawling.

And to top it off I have had 5 kids and all of my infants SERIOUSLY have not cried like ever…..until this one.  She is colicy.  I am learning so much patience!  And I can’t even imagine you moms who have dealt with babies who cry nonstop.  How do you do it??  Are infants allowed to sleep in the backyard alone when they’re crying?

I know this too shall pass and I will have other obstacles to overcome but this parenting 5 kids with two babies thing ain’t no joke.  Now please ignore everything I said and pretend I am just as happy as a clam to have 5 kids and I am rocking this whole thing!!  😉

xoxo, Shea